Pretty sure I’ve covered the fact that moving is exhausting. By “moving” I mean both the act of moving to Kentucky with 195 boxes, a dog, and a daughter, and the act of getting out of bed everyday and walking to the bathroom. Moving is exhausting.
Living with Multiple Sclerosis has been difficult. I get mad at myself for not being able to perform and function the way I did before my diagnosis. I get mad at myself when I have to take a nap in the middle of a task, or when I miss a family breakfast because I can literally not pry my pins and needles legs out of bed.
For the first decade of my diagnosis, my lesions (or “diamonds” as I refer to them) caused physical difficulties – temporary blindness, vertigo, cane usage, extreme fatigue, loss of feeling in my foot, you know, the stuff that makes people stare and possibly point at you. Even though it sometimes struck me down, I practiced “mind over matter”. No physical ailment could slow me down – figuratively. Anything that was thrown my way got smashed to pieces through physical therapy, walks through nature, and my determination to overcome.
My most recent flair up changed all that. My symptoms are now almost all cognitive - delayed responses in conversations, inability to process new information, and slow comprehension. My symptoms are no longer visible and that has led to a lack of understanding and a lack in patience from myself and others.
To overcome, I go back to what has led me into the light so many times before – setting small, achievable intentions for every day.
o Sort through a box of old files today
o Go for a walk outside then take a shower
o Call and chat with two friends
o Attend Horse Therapy
Any cross off my daily “to do” list brings me closer and mentally ready to achieve my larger goals.
o Clear through all my belongings brought from Wisconsin in order to organize and
personalize my new space
o Install a Bluebird Box at Kamp Kessa and teach Dr. T how to monitor and document
o Learn about backyard birding opportunities with Kristin of Wild Birds Unlimited
o Connect and lead my therapy horse, Derby, in order to strengthen my mind and
regain confidence in my abilities both physical and cognitive